ORIGINAL LETTER TO GOD

Lord, even the city cannot hide the ugliness of the baboon

Dear Father:
Hahaha, ooh, hahaha! Father have you heard the news? They say the Footballer Camp na suspend some of its star players for displaying their rudeness at the Traditional Council the other day.

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Lord, all their dirty secrets shall come to light

Dear Father:
Hmmm, we are here. Ehn all their dirty secrets coming outside small, small. The Good Old Book can't lie. It says at the end, all the hidden things shall come to light. It is left with my fellow villagers to see and know the kina mind the big, big people in our village have for this place.

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Lord, let them leave the Footballer alone ya

Dear Father:
I say drama can't finish ya. So they say one little side squeeze of the Footballer is now running after him for child support? And if I got the story correct did they say the pekin na chopped 10-years? So if the pekin na chopped 10-years then it means the Footballer must have impregnated the thing during the heat of 2005.

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Lord, they say the liar can say my witness is dead!

Dear Father:

The old people can say, the person who can tell lie can say my witness is dead but in this case, my witness is truly alive. You see, I often tell people that no one can hide from the truth. No matter how long it takes the truth will always show face.-And like we say in our village here, when it burst, we will all smell it.

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Lord, can you tell this chief to return the old man expired fish?

Dear Father:

I have heard that of late, there has been some ongoing battle between the sleepy old man who wants to replace the old lady at the Castle and a mouthy little rascal chief at the Traditional Council.

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Lord, da the only family da know book in this village?

Dear Father:

I know some people will say I am small in my thinking and there is no law in our oracle that says that the Old Lady or any other person seated in our village Castle can't give job to an entire family or take 6 people from one small village or three brothers to serve in the kitchen staff at the very senior levels too during the same period.

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Lord, how can they distance themselves?

Dear Father:
You know, of late it is becoming very common in our village for chiefs from the Traditional Council and others like them to always distance themselves from our village establishment. More often, they blamed all of their combine failures on the head of the Old Lady.

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Lord, I am an advocate too

Dear Father:

There is a maxim that tyrants make fools heroes. But over time in our village Father, I have come to realize that even cowards do make fools heroes. In fact, being a kind of super hero too is very easy here.

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Lord, what kina people are we?

Dear Father:

You know, I am the type that is very difficult to frown at my kids whenever it comes to disciplining them-no matter how hard I try to do it in anger. So in order to make them feel that I am serious, I would often fake the frown.

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Lord, are we safe?

Dear Father:

Huh, the one that happening here now, I don't know what to say oo. Just the other day they say one big man went for boat ride with his friends and he felt off the boat, just to find his body the next day. Can you imagine this Father?

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