Lord, who wants to put sand in the Oldma & Papy gari?

Dear Father:

You know, sometimes I can’t really understand the people in this our village here. They always like to look for ways to bring palaver between people, especially when the two people are so closed and very friendly.

And when they finish causing the problem then they go sit down like butter can’t melt.

Look at the other trouble they na bring here again. I don’t know who go say the Iron Old Lady and her Papy Joe na on speaking terms again? They even had the Papy speaking as if there is a serious bad blood and disappointment between their two.

My son what they say is really going on between these two people?

Can you imagine Father, the people even went further. They say the Old Lady had abandoned the Papy and was now pumping money behind that man who almost die out of frustration in 2005,
after some fake men of God told him to just go and sew his suit for his coronation as king for our village when in actual fact the people did not even consider him among the first two best choices.
And they say she is doing it at the expense of the Handshake and Papy Joe.Then they did not only stop there, they say the Old Lady say she na like the Papy. They say the Papy weak and he like sleeping too much.

Tell me something my son!

Father da small thing. The thing that made the people from the Castle couldn’t sleep. They were passing all around to all the Town Criers, explaining how the people are lying on the Old Lady and the Papy.
They even say before the Old Lady could leave for Queen Sheeba’s home town, she and the Papy had their heart to heart discussion as to how to give some people wah-wa.

Hmmm, they na stop there, they say the Old Lady is playing a very dangerous game for this year when she suppose to be retiring, by eyeing da other little man. My Name Ooh!

Aw wa, my son, who the other little man again?

Father, my name ooh, I na get ray shoes to go to court this morning ya, let leave stories. This one I na putting it in any hole. But no Father, like seriously, they say behind every smoke there is a fire-beit false fire or real fire.
Behind all these noise we are hearing come down to only one thing-money, money, money.

The people say the Old Lady too mean. They say she na want to conjugate the verb with some of her retirement money to help the Handshake Group and the Papy. But some people say even though the Old Lady get
glued on her hand, but she says the people from the Handshake group are very ungrateful-they don’t want to conjugate the verb too-you bring, I bring.

But my son, she thinks that the man who almost die from heart attack 11 years ago will give her what she wants?

Hmmm, Father you just don’t understand. These people in our village, um, na wa oo. Anyway, they will be just fine.

So my son, hey say what going on in the Footballer’s camp since he joined with the Ray Hay Man and da disgraced chief?

Father, da is another interesting place to ease drop. They say the disgraced Chief has been looking for attention. They say he is even trying to leave that whole group.

For what my son?

Father, they say the man says, the other two leaders-meaning the Footballer and the Ray Hay Man’s ex-wife suppose to be behind him sitting by him under the Palaver Hut when the Council of Elders called him to answer
questions about the stolen money he received. He says by so doing then everybody will know that they are together but the people are not helping him and they are leaving him alone so he wants to leave them.

But wait oo son, da the people told him to put his hands in the cookies jar? And in the first place, when he got his lay thing did he share it with them before they must come and sit behind him like that-nonsense! This village is
so interesting.

Lord, we will need more drips for 2017 oo

Dear Father:

Hahaha, ooh hahaha. I think we will really need a lot of reserved drips in this village to keep for the election oo, because the way I see plenty people hallucinating around here when reality sets in after the voting it will na be easy.

Are you for real my son?

But Father, what I should say na, for the past two voting we have done in our village this year own pa, da na small people want position.

The other day I went to my friend them radio station, I could not even find a place to pack my jalopy. When I asked what was going on, my friend told me that the people who want be chiefs at the Traditional Council oo.

You know, Father, the reason why I say the people should bring in more drips is because I can see many of the people who want to be chief at the Traditional Council getting heart attacks.

The plain and simple truth is that some of them are not even chief material and instead of taking that their little money to go and invest in some kind of business for they and their families, they want spend it on campaign.

Can you imagine Father there are some of them who are also transporting people from one fiefdom to another in our village?

What kind of person who wants to be a chief in a particular village will do such a thing?

Father, trust me; these are the conned artists who have failed miserably and know fully well that the people in those fiefdoms will never vote them there again. They are the ones now faring people to their fiefdom to register and vote for them.

And you know what Father; these shameless people go around boasting that even if some town criers are willing to be trucked in their fiefdoms they are willing to take them there. But for me Father, you know I am not freaked out by that.

There is a saying that he, who laughs last, laughs the best. And quite honestly, what dog cares about family planning? If they like they should go and burn the sea.

But one thing, I am sure of is there is going to be a lot of frustration around here after the 10th month of this year.

And Father, let me use this forum to warn all my friends them, if you know your fallback positionna strong and you go put your hand in wanting to be chief, when they people chop your money don’t come crying poor to me.

I know ehn. So what about the other people who making all the big mouth around here saying that they get plenty money to spend?

Father, just leave them, we are packing plenty drips around here.


The Fight for Ocean Health

By José MaríaFigueres, Pascal Lamy, and John D. Podesta

NEW YORK – The ocean is changing – and not for the better. Well-established scientific evidence shows that it is becoming emptier, warmer, and more acidic, putting marine life under serious pressure. But there is good news: evidence also indicates that the ocean can regenerate, and the world has already agreed to enable that outcome.

The Sustainable Development Goal for the Ocean (SDG 14) was adopted by world leaders in September 2015 as part of the United Nations 2030 Agenda for Sustainable Development. It includes vital targets, such as mitigating ocean acidification, securing habitat and species protections, reducing pollution substantially, and ending illegal fishing and subsidies that lead to overfishing.

Ultimately, SDG 14 promises to preserve the ocean and ensure its sustainable use in the future. But it can be realized only with bold and urgent action, buttressed by solidarity among governments, citizens, and business.

This week, governments and experts are gathering in New York to begin crafting a global “call for action” to implement SDG 14. The call, which will be launched in June, at the UN’s first-ever Ocean Conference, should include a firm commitment to protect at least 30% of the ocean by 2030, and ensure that the remaining 70% is sustainably managed. UN member states must also pledge to secure the extension of legal protections to high-seas biodiversity by closing the gaping governance loophole that exposes the ocean to plunder.

There is one more priority area that the call for action must address: climate change. In fact, a healthy ocean will be impossible to secure without also addressing this pressing global challenge. Achieving SDG 14 therefore demands that the international community reaffirm its commitment to the Paris climate agreement, and to announce concrete steps toward achieving net-zero carbon emissions by 2050.

To avoid more empty promises, all commitments must be backed up by a clear financing plan and subjected to regular accountability checks. Governments, the UN, and other actors should set a schedule for monitoring and check-ins, to keep delivery of the targets transparent, funded, and on schedule.

To support these efforts, we urge UN Secretary-General AntónioGuterres to appoint a Special Representative for the Ocean, tasked with improving ocean governance and ensuring that the full potential of SDG 14 is realized. Such a representative must be given sufficient resources to do the job.

The ocean has suffered decades of abuse and neglect. It has been treated as a free-for-all garbage bin and race-to-the-bottom buffet. We have financed its destruction, with no regard for the consequences. But those consequences have become impossible to ignore. While we, as previous global ocean commissioners, had to campaign hard in 2014 for the ocean to have its own dedicated global goal, it is now hard to believe that the ocean’s position in the SDGs was ever in question. That is the sense that we should have in 2030, when the targets of SDG 14 are fully met.

The only way to get there is through concerted effort – and not just by the likes of ocean commissioners. People everywhere must stand up and demand real action to ensure the ocean’s regeneration. In short, the ocean must become everyone’s business.

To kick-start that process, we have joined the Ocean Unite network, which is galvanizing conservationists, business leaders, young people, and activists to take advantage of growing interest in these issues and create coalitions that can drive ocean health to the top of political and economic agendas worldwide.

Such efforts are already having an impact, with citizens mobilizing to defend the ocean and policymakers beginning to respond to their calls. Now, it is the business community’s turn to step up.

Business has a clear interest in reversing the decline in ocean health. The GDP derived from the ocean amounts to $2.5 trillion, or 5% of the world’s total GDP. That’s equivalent to the GDP of the world’s seventh-largest economy. The ocean is also the world’s biggest employer, directly supporting the livelihoods of more than three billion people, and is a source of food for over 2.6 billion. Restoring the ocean thus amounts to an unparalleled business opportunity.

But the ocean’s value goes far beyond economics. It provides half of the air we breathe, governs our weather, and helps to support peace and prosperity. The ocean’s future is the world’s future.

At a time when politics threatens to undermine cooperative action on the environment, fighting for our shared global environment is more important than ever. Our responsibility for the ocean’s health is as deep, fundamental, and permanent as our dependence on it. No political consideration can compete with that. Now is the time for all of us – citizens, business, and government – to unite and fight for our ocean.

José MaríaFigueres, former President of Costa Rica, is Co-Chair of the Global Ocean Commission. Pascal Lamy, a former director-general of the World Trade Organization, is a Global Ocean Commissioner. John D. Podesta, Chief of Staff to President Bill Clinton from 1998 to 2001, is the founder of the Center for American Progress.

Lord, only if they knew the power they have!

Dear Father:
You know the other day; I was in conversation with some unusual visitors in my little office when the topic of Adam’s whereabouts as at the time Eve had the conversation with the Serpent in the biblical Garden of Eden came up in passing.

Read more ...

Lord, this was a real dog fight

Dear Father:
Huh, have you heard the news? They say it was not easy at the Pappy’s house last night. You mean after they left the football field they had to end up at the Pappy’s house too, they couldn’t allow the old man to rest with the old ma small.

Read more ...

Lord, what will the Ray Hay man be thinking right now?

Dear Father:

You know, the other day I heard that the Footballer was going to announce how he was joining forces with the Rogue disgraced Paramount Chief who was booted out of the Traditional Council because he could not keep his hands off the cookies jar.

Read more ...

Lord, we will never understand

Dear Father:

Hmmm, it’s hard to explain. No matter how hard we try. It will always remain a mystery-a mystery indeed. There is not one person who has ever gone there and come back to tell us how the place look.

Read more ...

Lord, but where Kparchue thought the Old Lady was carrying him?

Dear Father:

Have you heard the news, they say a certain chief whose name means old switch in one of our local vernacular has been taken to a certain location where drips are being administer to him. They say the man cannot get over the political earthquake at the Traditional Counsel that saw his dreams swept away in split seconds-even his deputy position is said to be under threats.

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Lord, did I hear “your send that man back?”

Dear Father:

Hahaha ooh, hahaha, they say small children can run but they can't hide for true ya. Hahaha, umm, monkey thought he was a man till a fine shot brought him down. What are you talking about my son and you are using all these parables?

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Lord, the same rope that hang baboon, can hang monkey

Dear Father;

You know, when I think about the way our chiefs do their politics at the Traditional Council, it reminds me of a virus. The virus may just start from your index finger but before you know it, what was only a problem, affecting just your left finger has travelled to your right hand and setting everything apart.

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Lord, you see, God don’t like ugly

Dear Father:

The old people say the breeze that can disgrace the chicken can always come from behind-yes, not in front. You know, I was listening to one of the town criers the other day when I heard somebody saying one prophet had long prophesized that our Paramount Chief from the lower end of the Traditional Council was going to meet up with his disgrace one day. They say the prophet said this doing one meeting held in one of our village fiefdoms.

Read more ...


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