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ORIGINAL LETTER TO GOD

Lord, can you tell this chief to return the old man expired fish?

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Dear Father:

I have heard that of late, there has been some ongoing battle between the sleepy old man who wants to replace the old lady at the Castle and a mouthy little rascal chief at the Traditional Council.

They say the fight has been over some expired boxes of fish one old Englishman, I mean Uncle Sam’s cousin, gave to the old man to come break his moral here. The fight, Father, I am told is not about the expiration of the boxes of fish- no not at all. But it is about the trick the little rascal try to pull on the old man.

What trick are you talking about my son? Father, they say when the sleepy old man received the expired consignment of boxes of fish, as part of his goodwill gesture, he decided to give some boxes to all the poor workers at the Traditional Council whose bosses including this little rascal chief have continued to pay them below minimum wages as a means of helping to add some value to their domestic dishes.

I am told one of the staffs of this chief had prepared a nice dried rice with some of the expired fish and brought it to the office and offered her boss breakfast-something he could not resist. I am told that after tasting it this little rascal asked his staff where she took the fish from? After telling him that oh, it was the sleepy old-man who divided it among the poor staffers at the Traditional Council, he requested that all his staffs brought theirs back or be sacked.

Tell me something my son! Wait, you haven’t even heard the juicy part yet Father. So after he threatened to sack his staffs if they did not return the old man’s gift, he went around fuming, with all kinds of rhetorics-not knowing he was angry that the old man had mean him with the expired fish and had rather chosen to give his staffs.

They say under a big show he went walking and talking like one jabber and dropped just nine out of the 15 boxes his staffs had returned to him. So where is the remaining six? Father, don’t say that one loudly, because as we speak, the rascal is eating the thing with dry rice every morning. Now it has choked him because the old man too is insisting that he gave 15 boxes to his staffers and his staffers said they returned 15 boxes except for one or two cams.

But let the man produce the old man’s expired boxes of fish. Father, it has become so shameful that the little rascal can’t produce it except he goes on the market to buy them. Why is it so my son?

Father, because it appears like the man finished eating all and he has nothing to do but to revert to big mouth to escape bashing. But I am told the old man’s people are insisting that he vomits it. Ha ha ha, huh, ha ha ha….. What so funny my son?

Father, have you ever heard that this little rascal chief had taken something from someone and return it before? What do you mean? Remember the sick people money that they entrusted him with from his community, the people have been beating drum behind him to bring their money back, conman can act like he can’t even hear them sef-then that some kina expired fish he finish eating he will carry back? I beg you ya. That boy has no shame Father. I think only you can ask him to return the old man’s expired fish, but I doubt he will ever return it.

 

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