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ORIGINAL LETTER TO GOD

Lord, da whatin I know sef?

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Dear Father:

Hmmm, I say da whatin I know sef about de people voting bisnay? Ehn they say we coming vote to change our village Oracle too. Let dem bring it anythin they bring me I will jus say yes!
Da whatin you saying yes to my son?

Father, me da everythin they will geh on de paper oo. Yes, Father everything theygeh on depaper. Ehn they say wemoh vote to change, da de change we wanna. So yes for change.
Hmm, dis one dey confused me. Da whatinyor changing na?

Father, our big, big people say we moh vote to change plenty tin: de time ourPreseden will stay in power, de time our chiefs from de Traditional Council will also stay in power and plenty other tins like de people who born here and leave our village to go to another village to be citizen there?
You don’t mean it?

Yes, oh Father. Da de truth me I talking so oo. In fact, da whatin I know sef, I talking plenty here so.
Bor de other people na agreefigh? I thought they say yor Elders from de Palaver Hut say de people from de Voting House moh take da one from inside?

Aah Father, da de tin we hear figh, figh. Bor de tin we hearing na, da different tin oo.
So, whatin different de people na bring inside again?

Father, de people who are in de Castle right na say, de Elders na say so oo. They say, de Elder dem say all de tin de people put inside doing de time de people dem go around de village to ask our people whatin they wan see change in our village Oracle moh all be inside.
Kayee! Den da na small tin oo
Yes, oo Father. Bor you na hear de one de people talking sef? They say, de time too short for de people in de village to go do voting on da one, so they wna de tin to be like da for de people to vote.
Um, dis one da na small noise oo.

Bor Father, da whatin I know sef. If we say, we mohna do it now wha time we will do it na? b’cause anybody who com to power wen they wan do it, we all will still hear noise inside. So, if it lee with my one, I will say we mohjus do it one and for all.

Hmmm, my son you na know whatin behind dis yor tin here oo.
Father, ehn da de tin bisnay, I say whatin I lnowsef. B’causede tin is if we likey, or we nalikey de people will stay do de tin they wan to do eh. We inside.

Hmm, anyway let talk different tin ya. They say no money in de village, da true?
Father, da de one you talking slow like da. You go to de bank for yor own money sef, is like you begging for it.

Bor, I hear some con-man dem using it na to lie to de girl demoo-especially de cheap, cheap one dem.
Yes, oo, Father da true. Dis broke, broke one dem can jus be lying to de people children wen they ask dem for money. “Baby ehn you know, no money in de bank. I say I wen to da place de whole day.” Da so, so grade. Sommohdemnageh 5 dalla. They jus hiding behind dis no money in de bank tin to cover their cheapness.

I know rite!
Yes oo Father, na fun. It lee with sommohdem, dis tin moh be like dis till Christmas come and pass-those cheap, cheap one dem you see so. Bor da de gehdemna wan mean dem da all. If da me I will sa go wen money come in de bank den we will continue from de place we stop.

See, yor owner wahala.
Hahaha, I tire ya! Da whatin I know sef.

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