Letter to God: Lord, this is what happens when you put round pegs in square holes

Dear Father,

The old people can say it na good to give men’s job to children. You see what happening na? You go take bunch of children who na know nothing about census you go put them to our census house. You see the kina shameful thing da happening to our village na?

Our neighbors in our global village fini counting their owner people. But for our village, we still fighting to explain how we chopped the money that was given to us in the first place.

See this kina embarrassment. It like a father who na know how many children he get because he had been sleeping with different, different women all over the place.

Hmm, my son where you going with this one again?

Yes, mehn Father, you mind the Country Giant and his people in this village here every day that story, story.

How will you take people and put them to a place where they know nothing about? Na loka what is happening na, the whole thing na turned to mockery. Shamefully embarrassing!

Imagine, the other day, the Country Giant na go declared by force holiday, just for people to stay home for nothing and nobody show up to count.

Can you imagine?

Yes, oo Father. And you know how things are looking very wonderful in our village where people gat to hustle every day before they get something to eat-you go say they mot stay home for census that did not even happen.

Anyway, da the country we find ourselves in-my friend can say “da Liberia here oo.” Yes na, because we do everything differently from the other people and it has gotten worse under this Jorweah man here. If his people’s hands are not caught in the cookie jar, then they are fighting each other for his attention. -Na why oo.

Tell me something my son?

Oh, Father, you haven’t heard how they have been fighting each other for his attention and making palaver among themselves just for our money.

And come to think of it, Father, when they are chopping our money they can’t talk oo. But by the time the village people make noise, and the Country Giant sacked them, then they become whistle blower overnight. -Puah.

Yes, oo Father. And interestingly, they get people who can see them as heroes. Loka, you can fool some people some time, but you can’t fool all the people all the time. For me, there is nobody that will be sacked from our village goworment that will come preach I am clean message to me- lala.

You had never been clean and will not even be clean thereafter. You know why, because when they give you another opportunity, you will continue from where you stop.

So, my son, what happen to the census na since they told you people to stay home on that day?

Hmm, the census is in coma in our city oo. And nobody has come to tell us anything about when the people will show up in the city but we heard them say they are in the villages counting.

How about the Country Giant and his people da na go to watch the World Cup, will they be counted?

Father, the people say they already know the number of people the Country Giant carried with him so they will just mark them. You see power!