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Pure Heart

Thank God I’m a Man – Part I

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I am happy that God made the universe – I would rather call it multiverse – and everything there in, especially the creatures called human beings, a group of which I am apart. But, as we all may know, these creatures are generally divided into two distinct groups – men and women.

I used the word “generally” because biological complications or mysteries may cause hermaphrodites, or he-she human beings. Other than that, to be repetitious, human creatures comprise two unique categories: men and women.

And, guess what? I belong to the man category. In other words, I am a man. Isn’t that good news? Yes, I am a man, not a woman. And thank God I am a man. Oh, yes, I am a man. And that’s a big deal. You like it, jacko; yon na like it, Jack-o’-Lantern.  I fool not to be happy that I am a man?

First of all, in Genesis 1:1, the Bible says God said, “Let us make man in our own image.” Now, pay attention. God did not say, “Let us make woman in our own image.” He said “Let us make man.” And no one should tell me that the word “man” in this passage applies to both men and women. It refers only to man. Thank God I am a man.

Second, I thank God that I am a man because God made man first. He took His own time to come down and play with the mud to form man, a creature whose creation was special to Him. Woman came later, a secondary creature. Da me say so. You may hiss like an angry snake. In the creation of human beings, man is a primary creature and woman is a secondary creature. I stupid not to be happy that I am a man?

Third, we only hear about the sons, not the daughters, of God. Even in talking about the angels of heaven, we have neither read, heard nor known about any female angels. We only hear about Gabriel and Michael and other male angels. Besides, Jesus Christ, the savior of the world, according to the Bible, is a man. Da small thing for Jesus Christ and I to have the same gender? Bug-a-bug eat my heart not to be happy that I am a man?

Fourth, I am happy I am a man because I can’t get pregnant where some crazy child will be stepping all in my stomach against my will. Besides, I want my stomach to be stretched a little due to over eating, not for my stomach to be extended in front of me stupidly, where I will not even be able to wash my own feet when taking my bath or rubbing cream. Yes, God, thank you for making me a man-o.

Fifth, thank God I am a man because I don’t have these stupid things called breasts on my chest, where, when I am very tired and deep asleep, some stupid baby will just grab my breasts and start sucking them as if they were the owner. No stupid child will feast on my chest. I want to enjoy my sleep. Thank God I am a man.

To be continued …
Seriously, my people, aren’t these points to ponder?

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