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Pure Heart

When Hobbies Become Interesting – Part I

Just as no two individuals are exactly the same physically, no two persons behave exactly the same in life. People engage in different activities for different reasons. They have varying preferences and value different things. This is called individual differences.

Hobbies, undoubtedly, are an example of those features that signify individual differences. People have their own reasons for taking up a specific kind of hobby. We all can’t like or do the same thing in life.

For instance, some people like playing with babies; others like playing with scorpions. Still, some prefer climbing the guava tree behind their house, while others prefer climbing Mt. Everest. It’s worth noting, though, that our opinion on, or judgment of, those reasons is besides the point.

Also, some people like fishing, while others like hunting. We all like different, different things. For example, some people like sucking candies, while other people like licking them. Still, others like chewing them. Some don’t like any of them at all. Da lie, my people?

And, let’s not forget, though, that our description of those hobbies as interesting, fantastic, risky, crazy, hilarious, buffoonery, ludicrous, unusual, disgusting, nasty, embarrassing or fiendish does not erase the fact that individual differences is a reality. In short, I may consider awful what you consider wonderful.

At this juncture, I would like to mention six of the hobbies that I think are worth taking up. For those of you who may not have any hobbies, or who may not know what kind of hobby to take up, I would suggest that you think about the following hobbies seriously.

Hobby #1

Riding bike naked. Imagine riding a bike naked on a country road or somewhere in the city, with your two pieces of butt well-balanced on the seat, but at the same time, split by the same seat. I feel like trying this one tomorrow when coming to work. Oh, what a great hobby!

Hobby #2

Collecting used condoms. This one is also interesting. Imagine going from place to place, looking for used condoms. The collected condoms could be kept somewhere, or washed, blown up as a balloon and used as decorations in homes, in schools, in rooms, in churches, at business centers, or at wedding programs. Imagine seeing used condoms hanging all over your room. What a fantastic hobby!

Hobby #3

Smelling dirty socks. Oh, this one is cool. Imagine yourself going from place to place, waiting for people to take off their shoes so that you can quickly take their socks and smell them. Or, still, imagine yourself visiting your neighbors, picking dirty socks from their shoes or dirty clothes basket and smelling them as long as possible. Isn’t this a fantastic hobby, folks?

Hobby #4

Pinching little children. Oh, yes, this one is cool, too. Think about this. You pinch the little child and it starts to cry, so you stop. When the child stops crying, you pinch it again, and it starts to cry once more. Or, more interestingly, you keep pinching the child and it keeps crying, without the mother or anyone knowing exactly why it is crying. It feels great, really. I hope some will consider taking up this hobby. Of course, no one should turn stupid to try it on my child. If it happens, baboon will divide kola. Da me say so.

Hobby #5

Picking dry pieces of mucus from the nose. It’s especially pleasant when there is fresh mucus at the end of the dry mucus. Constantly picking them from the nose with the index finger and looking at them before finally rubbing them on any surface is just wonderful.

Hobby #6

Street farting. This is especially fantastic when you walk, where the fart produces an explosive sound like “buufff-bleh-bleh-buuf-pee-oo,”as you move one leg after the other. It doesn’t matter whether others are walking behind you, or you are walking with friends or family members. The point is that it is your hobby – you like doing it.

To be continued…
Seriously, my people, aren’t these points to ponder?

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